so i made a big mistake

Do I miss you so badly?
Or the mere absence of any form of
affection...

Driven to vicarious satisfactions,
serving no means but to prolong
a self imposed exile.
From myself.

And it's of my own doing is it not?
thus one should live with it and the
aftermath that follows.

Scars I won't let heal.
Maybe I should just leave.

to kitty.

Here's to you.

To life, to love, to things that will be,
and to what should or could have been.
To the sight of your smile,
more often than tears or frowns.

over

Got no words this time,
though time is all that's left.
Thoughts still wander
to way back when.
My reflection makes me shudder.

recurring

I dreamt;
the smell of your shampoo.
skin on skin was still in.

Chest gently heaving up and down
while you snoozed and I looked on.

And it was you,
the scent you left behind.
Just a memory now, I suppose.

Vacancy sign on my bedpost.
Room for one more.
This once shiny new key is starting to rust,
Just have to find a new door.

I swept the broken pieces off the floor.
Mediocre rhymes and rhythms replace an old familiar tune.

It's sinking in.
But the dreams won't stop,
and I still have to get up.

And beneath the sheets
where 2 pairs of feet
would often times meet;

Where flesh and whispers and truths
once converged.
All's left is an empty urge.

*cue in alarm bell ring.